Most of us are busy. That part is true.
The more interesting question is what our busyness is protecting us from.
Sometimes, changing the words we use is the first step toward changing how we live.
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Hi, I’m Coach Tony, and this is Ask Coach Tony.
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What We Really Mean When We Say “I’m Too Busy”
When was the last time you said you were “too busy” to do something?
Everyone seems to be busy. Too busy to invest in personal growth, too busy to develop others, too busy to take care of their health.
Which raises an important question. How is it possible that everyone is this busy?
Today, I am going to challenge you to replace the phrase “I’m too busy” with something else. This new phrase is more accurate, honest and will help reshape how you think about your time.
Unintentional Dishonesty
You may already be asking yourself, “Why should I stop saying I’m too busy. I am busy, do the words matter?”
I have explained many times why your words matter to your brain, all of that still applies here. But there is another reason why “I’m too busy” is a phrase you should eliminate.
It’s dishonest.
You’re not intentionally lying per se, just using an inaccurate shorthand phrase.
In my Reflections on Leadership book, I shared how author Janet Choi has translated “too busy” into more honest terms.
When somebody talks (or brags!) about how busy they are, they are usually saying one of the following:
- “I matter” – people want to remind you of their significance.
- “I am super important” – people like feeding their own ego.
- “I’m giving you an easy excuse” – they just don’t want to be honest and say no.
- “I’m afraid” – they are working to conquer their fear of missing out.
- “I feel guilty” – they are feeling guilty about spending too much time on unproductive stuff.
When you are saying “I’m too busy,” which one of these statements are you actually saying?
The “Too Busy” Upgrade
Try this simple change to your language to improve your life.
Instead of saying “I’m too busy,” say, “That’s not a priority for me right now.”
That’s it.
One simple change.
But it isn’t that simple. It’s actually very powerful.
First, swapping “too busy” for “not a priority” is more honest. As Laura Vanderkam writes, we all have the same 168 hours available every week, and we all make choices about how we want to invest that time.
“Too busy” sounds like life is happening to you.
“That’s not a priority for me right now” is more empowering. It reminds you that you are in control of your time.
You’re the boss here.
The benefits of this language change aren’t limited to making you feel better. This simple language change will likely lead you to a powerful reckoning.
Is That Really Not a Priority?
After you replace “too busy” with “that’s not a priority,” start paying close attention to what things you are saying are and are not priorities.
What happens when you catch yourself saying that things like your goals, relationships, and health aren’t priorities?
It’s going to feel a little jarring. If those things aren’t your priorities, what is?
Paying attention to things you aren’t considering priorities will likely trigger a reevaluation of how you invest your time. I recommend asking yourself a few meaningful questions
- What are your goals?
- What do you want to accomplish?
- What are your values?
Use the answers to these questions to help you decide how to prioritize your time.
Intentionally investing your time in a way that’s aligned with your priorities will start freeing you from the “too busy” quicksand. You’re going to accomplish more in the same number of hours that you couldn’t have imagined adding one more thing to in your “too busy” days.
How do you want to spend your 168 hours each week?
Pro Tip: If these questions feel harder than they should, you’re not alone. Grab the Project Manage Your Life Starter Kit, and the email mini course will guide you through figuring out what you really want to achieve. Click here to get started today.
Bye Bye Busy!
Making intentional decisions regarding how you invest your time is a first step in slaying the “too busy” dragon. But there are more steps along the path to truly taking back control of your time.
You don’t have to face those steps alone.
If you’re ready to stop being too busy and to start making space for things that actually matter to you, I’m going to help you get started.
I have a time machine for you, and I’m sharing it at my next Goal Crusher Coffee Chat.
None of Your Busyness
A time machine for people who feel “too busy”.
In this session, we will walk through simple, practical steps my clients use to reclaim their days.
Then we’ll shift into an informal roundtable where we’ll challenge ourselves with one powerful question:
What’s one step you could take to find 30 minutes each day to work on something that matters to you?
If you’re ready to stop letting “I’m too busy” decide what gets postponed, this conversation is for you.
Save your spot below for this free event.
We all have the same 168 hours each week, so the real issue isn’t time. It’s how we choose our priorities. By changing your words, you can start being more honest about whether you are spending time in a way that makes you proud or drains your energy. Before you know it, you will be more in control of your time and your journey than ever before.
You’re here for a reason. Let’s take the next step.
Meet Coach Tony
Tony Weaver is a master life coach, technologist, consultant, writer, and founder of Operation Melt.
He helps project managers and other left-brained high-achievers pursue their biggest goals.
Through free resources, personalized coaching, and his proven Project Manage Your Life system, Tony empowers clients to move their dreams from “someday” to success… one step at a time.
Learn more about Project Manage Your Life, the system my clients and I use to crush our goals, at OperationMelt.com/PMYL/
Meet Coach Tony