When I’m coaching, I’m always listening and jotting down notes. My Coach’s Notebook is full of progress updates, plans, ah-has and quotes.
Here are three phrases I noted in Q1 that are still rattling around in my head… and I think you need to hear them too.
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My Clients Don’t Know Each Other. But They Said the Same Things.
If you have ever had a coaching session or coffee chat with me, you may have noticed my Coach’s Notebook. The little notebook I use to capture progress updates, setbacks, ideas, ah-has and plans from my clients.
I’m always listening, processing, reflecting and noting what my clients are saying.
Most of the time, my notes are bullet points. Summaries. The gist of what someone said.
Occasionally, a client will say something that lands in a different way. That’s when I write down their exact words. The actual quote.
These quotes stick with me and bounce around in my head long after the session ends.
And sometimes, the really interesting ones show up again from a completely different client in a completely different context. That’s when I know I’m onto something.
Today, I am sharing three such quotes from this quarter.
These are quotes from clients who don’t know each other, working towards different goals, but said nearly identical things. Things that I think are relevant to every high achiever.
Including you!
“I Just Need to Get My Life Together This Week”
I hear versions of this one a lot. The exact words change. The feeling behind them never does.
“I need to get my life together.”
“I just need to get my shit together.”
“I need to figure my life out.”
These phrases feel like goals. They feel like clarity. But here’s the thing: they aren’t either of those things.
These are stories, and a story is not a plan.
When I hear clients say things like this, I ask them to tell me what “getting it together” actually means. What would have to be true before our next session for them to feel like they had gotten it together?
Why?
Because amorphous language keeps you stuck and overwhelmed. Specific language gets you moving.
If you catch yourself saying “I need to get my life together,” stop and ask: what does that actually mean? What are the real things underneath that phrase?
Name them. Write them down. Now you have a list, not a feeling. And a list, you can work with.
“I don’t feel like I’m as buttoned up as your other clients.”
This is another one that I heard from multiple clients. Different people with different versions of the same feeling.
One said, “I was nervous to bring this up, but it’s something that’s always in my mind.”
Another said, “I don’t feel like I’m as buttoned up as other clients.”
Let me be direct about something: I don’t compare my clients to each other. Every client is working through their own stuff on their own timeline. That’s the whole point.
But more importantly, neither should you.
Comparing your adversity to someone else’s is one of the fastest ways to discount your own needs.
When you measure your struggles against a real or imagined version of someone else’s, you end up deciding that your problems aren’t serious enough, your questions aren’t smart enough, or your needs aren’t valid enough to bring up.
And then you don’t bring them up.
And then nothing improves.
Your struggles are just as real and just as relevant as anyone else’s. More so, actually, because they’re yours. They’re the ones affecting your life, your goals, and your sense of what’s possible.
Don’t compare. Don’t discount. Ask for what you need.
That’s not weakness. That’s how progress happens.
“I’m Starting to Believe I Can Do This.”
This is my favorite section.
Three different clients this quarter said something that made me smile.
“I’m starting to believe I can do this.”
“If it doesn’t work out how I planned, it will still work out.”
“I don’t have to feel like I’m living my life in chaos.”
These are lightbulb moments. And as a coach, there is nothing better.
Not because the hard work is over. It isn’t. But because something shifted in how these clients were talking to themselves. They were starting to believe in themselves.
That shift is everything.
It’s not always fast or a straight line.
But it is real.
And it is available to every single person who keeps going.
When I hear a client say “I’m starting to believe I can do this,” I know we’ve hit a milestone. Not the finish line. A milestone.
Because once you start believing it, the next step gets a little easier.
That’s momentum.
That’s what we’re building.
Anchors Away
All of these quotes focus on building the right mindset for success. Nothing kills that mindset like feelings of unchecked negativity.
Do you feel like the world around you is one big dumpster fire?
When you are trying to achieve any goal, negativity serves as an anchor that holds you back and slows your progress.
Expert goal crushers manage their mindsets and energy… proactively protecting positivity.
You don’t have to protect your positivity alone, the next Goal Crusher Coffee Chat will help.
Fireproof Your Positivity
Protecting your positivity when the world’s a dumpster fire.
In this session, I will open up my Coach’s Notebook and share a few of the strategies that work best for my clients when they are avoiding dumpster fires.
Then, during our roundtable, we will each answer one simple question:
What’s one thing you can do this week to fireproof your positivity?
If you are ready to ditch the anchor of negativity and start proactively protecting your positivity, this conversation is for you.
Click below or visit OperationMelt.com/CoffeeChat to save your spot for this free event.
The quotes in my Coach’s Notebook aren’t just notes. They’re proof that the things you’re carrying around in your head are not unique to you. Other people are saying the same things. Feeling the same things. And navigating their way through.
You’re not behind. You’re not broken. You’re not alone. You deserve a space where your struggles are taken seriously, not compared and dismissed. That’s what we’re here for.
You’re here for a reason. Let’s take the next step.
Meet Coach Tony
Tony Weaver is a master life coach, technologist, consultant, writer, and founder of Operation Melt.
He helps project managers and other left-brained high-achievers pursue their biggest goals.
Through free resources, personalized coaching, and his proven Project Manage Your Life system, Tony empowers clients to move their dreams from “someday” to success… one step at a time.
Learn more about Project Manage Your Life, the system my clients and I use to crush our goals, at OperationMelt.com/PMYL/
Meet Coach Tony