One important tool is required for all self-improvement. Hint: it doesn’t start by saying “I’m right, you’re wrong, so shut up!” By taking a different approach and admitting that you might be wrong, you are starting your goal-crushing journey off on the right foot.
Learn more about this simple, yet essential self-improvement hack in this week’s Goal Success by Choice.
Amuse Bouche
Before we get to today’s post, I offer you this light “amuse-bouche” to entertain your mind before we get down to business. Like any other amuse-bouche, you may hate my “dad joke,” but it is worth every penny that you paid for it, right?
As a colorblind man, I am intrigued by the theory that no two people see colors in exactly the same way. I guess you could say that colors are just a pigment of our imagination.
Goal Success by Choice
Do you have dreams that you are trying to make come true? Do you have a goal that you are trying to crush? Success doesn’t happen by chance. Success is a series of choices that can make you unstoppable. Goal Success by Choice helps you make these choices to move you closer to your goals.
Are you ready to help build a world where no goal dies of loneliness?
One Simple Hack To Crush Your Self-improvement Goals
The Person Who Fails the Most Wins
Seth Godin
In my journey, I have learned that there is one secret to all self-improvement.
One secret can make you healthier, wealthier, a better leader, a better person and happier.
This secret life hack is readily available to all of us, but it seems to be in very short supply in the world around us.
Here’s what I mean…
Shut Up, I’m Right, You’re Wrong!
Have you watched any cable news lately? How about social media comments; have you read them? If not, congratulations and I envy your discipline!
Maybe you have done something more hands-on and had a discussion about politics or other current events with somebody.
The outcome of all of these activities tends to be very similar. You will observe somebody boiling complex issues down to black and white talking points that have been pounded into their brains. Or, you will find that somebody has an opinion about what the world should be doing based on utterly baseless nonsense.
No matter their angle, many people have the same approach to their point of view: they are right, you are wrong, there is no changing their mind, and they wish you’d just shut up.
Why are so many people so emotionally and aggressively stuck in their opinion and dismissive of facts that may prove them wrong? In my experience, a significant portion of the problem boils down to a one-word answer.
I have observed a stunning lack of humility in the world around me.
This absence of humility is so frustrating to see and really confuses me because it is so self-sabotaging.
Perspectives on Humility
I could write for pages and pages about what humility is, why it is important and share hundreds of examples of humility successes and failures. In fact, several portions of my Reflections on Leadership book touch on the importance of humility to good leadership.
Instead of digging deep into humility, I will share a quote that particularly resonates with me.
Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.
C.S. Lewis
Humility is not about downplaying your strengths. It is not about adopting an “aw, shucks” or “I don’t know, I’m just a xxx” self-dismissive personality. That’s dishonesty and the opposite of humility.
True humility is admitting you don’t know everything and can learn something from everybody around you. It is about leading with empathy and curiosity to genuinely understand new things. It is about being vulnerable. It means putting others’ needs ahead of your own sometimes. It means generosity.
Humility usually means listening more and talking less. But humility could also mean that you aren’t hiding your perspective or knowledge when it could help somebody. You are using your talents for the benefit of others.
In short, humility is about recognizing that we are all imperfect and growing beings and genuinely wanting us all to improve together.
Most importantly, humility is the basis of all self-improvement. Unless you can admit that you aren’t where you want to be, that your choices have created your current reality and that you want to get better, self-improvement isn’t possible. It is a foundational requirement without which nothing in your life will change for the better.
Five Times
I have many examples of when humility has been essential throughout my life. So many that I can’t even begin to count. Some of my personal examples were tough lessons that I learned, and some resulted in significant accomplishments that make me very proud of myself.
But, I have spent a lot of time vulnerably sharing my fitness and personal transformation journey with you. So, I have chosen five quick examples to share to illustrate the value of humility in self-improvement.
- Humility to take the first step. When I stepped on that scale and heard the painful truth from my doctor, I had a moment of humility. I admitted that things weren’t working, and I had to make a change. Without embracing humility, I would never have even started this journey that has resulted in some of my proudest moments and accomplishments. As I mentioned above, all self-improvement begins with humility. Committing to a SMART self-improvement goal is a clear act of humility.
- Humility to set myself up for success. At the beginning of my journey, I didn’t know how to be successful. So I embraced my humility again and researched how to be successful with my weight loss journey. Plus, I took several partners, especially my doctor, to help me get on the right track. Leveraging your “team of experts” instead of trying to go on your journey alone will help you build a plan that works for you.
- Humility to seek help. I had been working out in the gym for a while and had just achieved my 100-pound weight loss goal. But I needed to admit that I didn’t know what I was doing in the gym and needed help to do better. That’s when I engaged a personal trainer to help me help myself get better.
- Humility to get better. When I became a runner, I had a few injuries and struggled to improve my performance. Then I started seeking input from every other runner I know in my life to get their tips and tricks. I started getting better at running, and I continue to improve. I still continue to seek expertise from others.
- Humility to give to help others. Early in my journey, I discovered I had experiences and knowledge that could benefit others. That’s why I was always willing to share my experiences in conversations. I launched my blog and wrote my book. Then I became a coach. I have decided that I want to give to others to help them accomplish their goals. Humility makes for the best teachers, mentors, authors and coaches!
As I said, this list could go on and on. For example, there are times that I want to run or achieve personal records, but I have to concede that my body needs rest, and the desire to run is just about ego.
And don’t get me started on the impact of humility on body image!
Your Turn
Are you convinced that humility is a secret self-improvement hack?
If you want to begin injecting more humility in your life, it is time to borrow from the scientific method.
Put simply, the scientific method is about doing your homework and forming a hypothesis. Then, use experimentation to test whether your hypothesis is valid. If it isn’t, evolve the hypothesis and try again until you have a repeatable result.
Do you see how this could be an important metaphor for living a life of humility?
You can start by actively approaching all situations in your life with the perspective of “here’s what I think, but I might be wrong.” Then, be willing and eager to discover new information that could prove your perspective wrong and make it better. The faster you disprove your hypothesis, the faster you can improve yourself.
Where can you better embrace your humility to help yourself and others grow?
So What
One important tool is required for all self-improvement. Hint: it doesn’t start by saying “I’m right, you’re wrong, so shut up!” By taking a different approach and admitting that you might be wrong, you are starting your goal crushing journey off on the right foot.
Do you need help? I am ready to do my best as your partner.
Click Here to learn more about my Operation Melt coaching services.
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